As I stepped thru the doorway into what can best be described as a "home gym" I saw it, this strange apparatus that was probably designed by some sadistic engineer who's achievements also include the mouse wheel. Head cocked to the side, a similar stance to that of a confused chicken I looked upon this new piece of equipment.

My thoughts on running are simple, it is better left to the horses and I am not a horse. However here I was, shoes laced up water bottle in hand and on the verge of climbing aboard our new treadmill to enter the realm of running. Arrrg I say. I have never thought of running as something fun or desirable to do, running is only necessary if fleeing for your life or if you have stolen something and our try to make a hasty get away. But again here I stand, on a magic carpet of sorts, walking warming up the legs. I feel as though my "look" would be complete if I where to adorn sweat bands around my wrists and head, some what of a Richard Simmons look.
The screen is flashing, demanding me to enter my weight. I follow the instructions, allowing the torture machine to calibrate for optimal pain. Soon the walk in the park warm up pace is over and I am running. Running and going absolutely nowhere, in fact traveling backwards at some moments. Oh god what is going on, why am I doing this to myself, why oh why?

Love is why. Soulmate plans on trail running with the dogs this summer and so I have decided the best thing to do is to join. That and the benefits of being able to outrun a zombie will surely pay off. In fact I will begin to encourage my friends and family to stop exercising so that during the event of bear, zombie or roaming pack of angry seniors attack I can flee leaving them distracted with my slower moving counter parts who, out side of the seniors, will become a meal. Seniors require soft food, usually prepared in a blender so odds are they won't be cannibals but just killers.

Lucky for me I am not running today, tomorrow but not today. I have chosen instead to sip coffee, walk in the woods and ski....

Tomorrow I will climb back on the moving death rug and run, run until I cannot run no more. Hmmm with all this running maybe I should compete in riots. I will practice my brick toss and my snatch and run.......

Peace and love